sighz

I think I'm at that point in my life where the simplest of things pisses me off/annoys me. I'm moodier than the average person and I am nowhere near being happy right now. I feel like i annoy the people I care about the most with my problems and all my thoughts and whatnot *sigh* I think I need God now more than ever before cause he alone understands,he alone can help me through it, they say he never gives u more than u can bare although I feel like I can't bare being a burden to people anymore. I'm afraid of opening up to people because I think I'll scare them away with all I have to say but at the same time I feel like I'm pushing people away by not being open and honest with them :(
I wish I could go back to when I was 5 when nothing ever bothered me and all I had to worry about were my dollies *sigh* I'm tired of keeping my tears in and when I do cry I'm tired of not being able to stop. I write this in an attempt to avoid doing something stupid. I feel like most people if not all has already given up on me all that's left is for me to give up on myself I'm hanging on by a really thin thread cause once I can give up on me then why should n't everybody else? *sigh*
So much more thoughts in my mind and I can't seem to express them as freely as I'd like. I just hope it will get better cause I honestly can't take this much more.

If u can't change it then accept it

The only thing that's constant in life is change. People change some for the better and some for the worse and we all have to experience change no matter what u do or who u are. The sad thing about change is most times we find it hard to accept a change instead we try to block it out or just ignore it because it's usually a case where we want to have things easy and the way we are used to it.
I have learnt that if u I don't like something i should change it if i can't change it then i should accept it although it's easier said than done but I'm trying to ACCEPT the way things are right now. My life has its ups and downs I got to choose to ride this roller coaster called life,I have got to live for today and hope for the future, got to appreciate the little things in life,I want to be happy so i have to ACCEPT life as it is. Life was never meant to be easy if it was then how would we learn and how would we grow?
In life friends will walk in and out but it's the few people who leave their footprints on your heart that really matter, some friends may change like the seasons but they're the ones who enter your life that help u realize who really matters and who never will and who your real friends are. Some friends make an impression on your life in such a way that no matter what they will always hold that place in your heart cause u'll have the precious memories and u'll always appreciate the times you shared.
Life is too short to hold grudges so just forgive and move on. Forgiveness is not for the weak but for the strong. So I'll try and forgive as much as i would want to be forgiven and I'll try and accept the changes that comes along.

destination:LIFE

I'm at a point in my life right now where I feel like I'm on the verge of breaking down I feel as if i have nothing left to give but for some reason I keep pushing trying to find something there. School annoys me one of my courses especially no matter what I do is like i can never seem to do it right and everything else is just average although i would believe or people have made me to believe I'm above average i have numerous capabilities that i just need to explore. Honestly i feel like i'm going to fail everything which i really can't afford to cause it's costly to re-do courses and it would be a major set back.
I recently started thinking to myself what really are my goals I'm majoring in something that I once loved but now i'm not so sure that's the path i wanna take. Although en route to the future it would be expected that a few detours would fall in place.
What happens when the people you always thought would be there for u fail u? Who are u going to rely on for advice and a shoulder to cry on and who are u going to share you secrets with? What do u do when your trust is betrayed more than once? How do u know u can trust someone after all u been through? I have questions but why can i never seem to come up with the answers?